Therapy Update

5/19/11

I really want to document Dave and I's journey through therapy and learning how to manage his depression.  In therapy on Wednesday, I realized that even though it has been a really slow process, we are starting to have some good skills in place.  Dave is learning that when thoughts of self-hatred come up, he needs to re-direct them or it will deepen/lengthen his depression.  We have a sticker chart for exercise, now, so we both exercise regularly, and we have a date night so we have some time set aside just with each other.  I am learning how to be directive without nagging - at the beginning of the week we check in with each other on what we hope to do that week.  Then if I have an idea that I think could help Dave, during the week, I tell him.  Last week I suggested that it could be a good idea to go hang out with friends, since sometimes that helps pick him up (Dave has been having a really hard time believing that people like him).  He didn't do it, but I was able to suggest something positive without nagging.

At the beginning of our therapy, I really wanted to clarify my expectations of Dave.  I felt like I had unrealistic and even contradictory expectations.  I feel much more comfortable now, because I know exactly what my expectations are.  If they are not met - that's fine, that happens.  But I feel happy knowing exactly what my expectations are, and feeling like they're reasonable.